99 problems but a bitch ain't one.

So, tonight started off in a frenzy of emotions. No lie. I went from; I'm ugly to I want a boy to I want to makeout with random boys to I just want to talk to cute boys to I'm getting the fuck out of this nerd fest to you aren't cool enough to hang out with me to [finally] content with how the night went.
I watched The Notebook.
lol.
Super Sappy to begin the night off. But in my defense, the book was kickass compared to the movie.
After that I went to Mr. Pizza with three random guys down the hall. Then ultimately ended up at the smokers table in search of Ben. iick. I know that, that is super scary that I was seeking him out but I don't know something about him intrigues me. So, I waited there for a while- then went and got a smoothie with Ashley, Hannah, Patricia and some other girls. They were gonna walk to Dyson to see Chris and I wanted to go back to Tannex so I walked off and low and behold...there he is sitting at the table. Which made me happy.

Now; let me break off into a tangent. This is for you mom. He's tall, got dark brown/blackish hair that is generally spiked up and geled all cute and junk... But, unfortunately- he has a girlfriend. Yes. I know.

So, I sat down and talked to him for a good while. Apparently, he dislikes the chick he's with and for good reason. She isn't that good looking...and okay well, here goes I'll be bitch about it- She's raunchy. Very, very raunchy. But, the main point is...he doesn't like her, so it makes it okay that I like him....right? Right? Please tell that I'm right.
So, he says that he's going to break up with her tomorrow. Not that, that leaves me anywhere or anything. But, it's good to know that he isn't going to stay with someone he doesn't have feelings for. In some ways he is like me in the sense that he rushed into something with her and I rushed into things with Shane.

As of now, he is currently sitting on my bed, leaned in reading everything I am writing. He thinks that he knows exactly what I'm thinking but, he doesn't. What he doesn't know is that everytime he's around I find myself thinking that I can't read him, that I wish I could tell where his mind was. Thats what intrigues me. Not knowing why hes here, why this room, why call me? To me, it makes no sense but maybe to him, he's got a plan got everything figured out. But then again, I always tend to overthink and overanalyise things. Who knows, maybe there aren't even thoughts about me in his head. Maybe I am just a friend to him, which is totally cool. I definately am not interested in rushing into anything with him. I always do that. This time, I want things to go slow and at a natural pace. This time, if there even is a "this time" I want to be friends and have the possiblity of it evolving to more. But who knows, maybe that will be the downfall in this.
Damn, life has a funny way of never being consistant.

Fuck that.

That's enough for now.

Peace, love, and promises of tomorrow.